Monday, January 14, 2008

The Coping Mechanism

Okay, so the hospital called me about some pre-op shit I have to do, namely a type/cross blood test to make sure they have my blood type there during surgery. I told the gal, "okay, just make sure the blood is at LEAST 1/3 vodka so I don't go into convulsions on the table and shit."

She didn't think that was very funny.

Just my way of dealing. Morbid? Sure! But hey, I can't rely on my looks forever. Thank GOD I have my sense of humor to fall back upon. Kinda like I had my accounting background to fall back on when I didn't quite make it as a rock star ;-)

Okay...so this test is new. Are they expecting me to bleed out or something? When I had that surgery last year, they didn't order this shit. I just had to go in, give them a bunch of info, sign zee papers, and viola: I was in the recovery room a few days later.

Apparently, this time is pretty serious. Of COURSE I'm freaking out, as well as my dog, who can't seem to stop crapping in the living room in the middle of the night lately. It's really funny how they can sense when something's wrong, isn't it? God bless her little heart. She just had a birthday, too! Six! Don't ya think it's about time she figured out that the carpet is NOT the lawn?

Anyway, I've pretty much been on mashed potatoes, jello & pudding for awhile, just to keep the pain to a minimum. Today I said FUCK IT and made some ultimate comfort food:

Oh, yeah, baby! Grilled ham & cheese, french fries (those frozen "fast food" kind) and bread&butter pickle chips. Dammit to hell, I was STARVING! I only ate about half, and the pain I'll be in for the next couple days will be worth it. Remind me I said that when I'm whining later...

I even took that pic with my new camera AND managed to download it! Once I stopped looking for a place to load the film, I was home free. LOL

Hope everyone has a great Tuesday!

Treble Thumbs Up

5 comments:

Alkelda the Gleeful said...

I hope your comfort food goes through smoothly. Poor Lady. I look forward to the time when you're on the other side of the mess. You are funny, by the way, even in the midst of harrowing tales.

Junebugg said...

We all need some comfort food once in a while, I've been craving chocolate lately

Hope all goes well, that you get much good drugs and that your life gets back in some kind of decent order

limpy99 said...

Just tell me where to send the vodka for your "recovery" period.

Big Pissy said...

yeah...what limpy said.... ;-)

TheBirdman33 said...

What the hell?!?! Bread and butter pickles? That should have been Kosher pickles, if you plan on moving in with me!